Goodbye November

I couldnt think of a better title...so I put goodbye november
lol
i LOVED last night(or this morning)... the convos we had wweres just amazing,... and you are such a darling
i love you!
im actually sitting in my boss' office right now...hmm
it's been a crazy day!
n today in art class we are having our last critique.. and im sooo lookng forward to it!
lol yeah im so vanilla right now..
ive got my exmas on my mind...
well...i hvae to go now...sorry if this was boring
i love you!

pee stats:
30th:
2:20am - 25 sec.
5:30am - 35sec.
9:00am - 20sec.
10:20am - 30sec.
12:30pm - 30sec.
3:15pm - 25sec.

Ben Wa Balls

What Are They?

Legend has it that women in ancient Japan or China first inserted egg-shaped hollow balls carved from ivory, then spent hours gently rocking back and forth, eventually experiencing a subtle-yet-crashing orgasm. Today, Ben Wa Balls are made from a variety of substances, including gold plating, silver, steel, plastic, Lucite and any combination thereof.

Because they are made from hard, non-porous substances, Ben Wa Balls don't absorb bacteria--so you can use them longer than other sex toys. Some women claim they wear them all day, experiencing clandestine fun at the office, the grocery store...even on dates. Other women enjoy using them for partner sex, and say their male partners love encountering the smooth balls during penetration. However, some women say the toys are little more than useless, producing a sensation so slight, they may as well not be using the balls at all.

While many Ben Wa novices express alarm at the thought of inserting and removing the balls, it's relatively simple: just pop them in and squeeze them out. You may want to experiment with location; some people enjoy holding them lower in the vagina, while others try to position them directly behind their G-Spots. Just don't aim for the cervix--while you're unlikely to have a problem with them slipping past your body's gateway to the uterus, you probably won't enjoy any kind of clanging sensation that close to your cervix, a region some women find particularly sensitive.

(http://www.mypleasure.com/education/sexed/benwaballs.asp)

"Legend has it that oriental women were the first to discover Ben Wa Balls. They inserted these balls into their vaginas and then rocked back and forth to achieve orgasm. Don't confuse Ben Wa Balls with Duotone Balls - the difference is Ben Wa Balls are just two large round bearing shaped balls (usually about 3/4" in diameter) that are inserted into the vagina. Dutone balls are balls inside balls and are much more likely to create internal stimulation. Where Ben Wa Balls seems to work best is in strengthing the bladder and tightening the walls of the vagina. This can be done by simply inserting and holding them in place for about 15 minutes a day. It is also reported that inserting them in the front of the vagina and wearing them daily helps to achieve "G-Spot" orgasm. "

(http://nawtythings.com/ben.html)

Few More Days To Go :-(

I leave 7th afternoon... :-(
sigh

Pee Stats:

NOVEMBER 29:

12:45am - 50sec.
2:20am - 20sec.
3:45am - 30sec.
5:15am - 40sec.
8:00am - 25sec.
10:35am - 30sec.
12:20pm - 25sec.
3:20pm - 20sec.

I don't have anything much to say...
Talk to you later tonight..

Profile...

I was looking around and found a new new pictures that I think we could use for our Yahoo profiles...
Let me know if you like any of these better than what we have right now....
















I love you.

Hi

Oh baby I am so sorry about last night... my laptop froze on me and I had a hard time restarting it..i guess its screwing up again...
i love you so much
dont worry about me ...if i leave like this its probably because something happened to my laptop or my internet screwed up
and wat happened with brandi:???
ur msg.. "I guess you will when.......... and if......... you decide to" confused me... im not sure what ur talking about..
well...i guess ill talk to u later about this..
i love you...sorry abt last night again

this whole thing with brandi just doesnt feel right
what?
why?
i dunno
just a bad gut feeling

Pee Stat:
Nov. 27

1:45am - 30 sec.
4:00am - 25sec.
8:10am - 55sec
9:45aam 40sec.
12:40pm - 65sec.
2:30pm - 25sec.
5:30pm - 20ssec.
6:55pm - 70sec.
8:00pm - 25sec.
10:05pm - 30sec

Long Day...

After we talked last night,...I didnt go to bed... I tried to, but couldnt fall asleep
So I started reading for school and I think i fell asleep at about 7 or so...
I think I can officially call myself insomniac.
LOL
And I've been wet all day...just like you'd like it :-)
I LOVED our convo last night too...
It's amazing how easily you can control how I feel
:-)
I love you

PEE STATS:
NOVEMBER 26:

4:50am - 25 sec.
10:00am - 90 sec.
12:30pm - 75 sec.
3:00pm - 30 sec.
7:20pm - 20 sec.
10:00pm - 45sec.

Be Happy...

I got this forward email today... and I thought it was very appropriate...
:-)

Be Happy Right Now

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get
married, have a baby, then another, get a new job,
get a new house.
Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough
and we'll be more content when they are.
The truth is, there's no better time to be happy....
than right now!
If not now, when?
Your life will always be filled with challenges.
It's best to admit this to yourself and
decide to be happy anyway.
Happiness is the way.
So, treasure every moment that you have and
treasure it more because you shared it
with someone special,
special enough to spend your time with...
And remember that time waits for no one!

So, stop waiting...
...until your car or home is paid off
...until you get a new car or a new job
...until you go back to school
...until you lose ten pounds
...until you gain ten pounds
...until you finish school
...until you get married
...until you get a divorce
...until you have kids
...until your kids leave the house
...until you retire
...until summer
...until fall
...until winter
...until spring
...until you die!

There is no better time than right now to be happy...
Choose To Be Happy TODAY!

:-)
I love you!

PEE STATS:
NOVEMBER 25:

1:45am - 30 sec.
3:20am - 40 sec.
5:00am - 60 sec.
8:55am - 55 sec.
11:45am - 45 sec.
3:30pm - 70 sec.
7:15pm - 65 sec.

Hi....

Im scared im falling for u....too much...
I cant stop thinking about u
I really dont want this to be like all the other old relationships i've had...
i miss u so much,...
it;s just been a really emotional day i guess....
im not sure if ill be able to be online tonight... I will try
takecare
hope u had a wonderful day.

Bad Move...

I'm not good as being in the dominant position....im horrible..
I think she just walked out of it...
im sooo sorry
i feel so bad..
and dissapointed in myself..
ill tell u what happened when we talk tonight...

PEE STATS:

NOVEMBER 23:
3:30am - 40 sec.
5:00am - 25 sec.
9:30am - 30 sec.
12:00pm - 25 sec.
2:40pm - 35 sec.
4:50pm - 40 sec.
7:40pm - 50sec.
10:30pm - 45sec.
11:20pm - 45 sec.

Honest Opinion...

Hi baby...
So last night was interesting...
I did enjoy it...but I was also kinda jealous... I know it's supposed to be all fun ... and I am going to try a lot harder to avoid feeling that way..
I trust you....

It's hard to put to words what I feel..
It's like something that makes me wet.. and also mad and jealous..

Anyways...me and her talked today moring..
And she acted really really stupid...

Heres some of our convo:

bee: oh..well i will keep looking the guy who brings it sometimes is slow putting it in my box
anki: which guy?
bee: the one in the little truck that comes to my house
anki: oh ur talking abt real physical mail, not email
bee: yeah well when i gets on it says you have mail but everytime brandi goes t o look box is empty
anki: what says u hhave mail? baby if the comp says u have mail..it means u have email...not letters kinda mail..
bee: the little cartoon on my computer .. but i goes outside and there isnt any there OHHHHHHHHHH
anki: dummie
bee: now me gets it. yes miss


anki: when was the last time u got some bitch?
bee: umm...seeems like it was not long
anki: was it?
bee: maybe a couple days
anki: ohhh i seee... so what if i restrict u?
bee: what is re stri ct?
anki: stop you bumb bitch
bee: stops
anki: what if i tell u not to have sex
bee: oh .. then i wont
anki: are u just saying that?
bee: i wants you happy
bee: no i will stop
anki: hmmm good...i will have to talk to Master..
bee: yes Miss Anki
anki: but I want you to ask mine and Master's permission first. do you understand?
bee: yes miss Anki


anki: how often do u play with urself?
bee: umm well.. whenever i isnt school or work i seems to
anki: so its an everyday kinda thing
bee: yes Miss
anki: well now you might hvae to go couple of days without touching urself. and sometimes... we might make you have to do it every hour...
bee: pouts ..yes Miss ,,oh ,,yes Miss
anki: and you wont know what to expect... you just do as you are told baby
bee: no Miss i cant thinks she just does what You and Sir tell her
bee: yes Miss i will
anki: good girl


and then we talked about time... and how to look at time.. and the diff between am and pm...
anki: this is how it works...\ am is from midnight...(12 at nghit) to noon (12 in the afternoon/morning)
bee: ok
anki: and now if thats am///when is pm slut?
bee: after that Miss?
anki: wehn baby...tell it how i said it.///
bee: from 12 in after noon to 12 at night
anki: good job
bee: ty MissAnki
anki: u will get a reward for that...
bee: oh goodies
anki: i need u to strip waist down... and spread ur legs...
bee: yes miss... oh
anki: tell me when ur ready
*blah blah...*

anki: spread ur legs wide... as wide as possible..
bee: okies Miss
anki: how is ur pussy slut?
bee: oh Miss pussy very wet
anki: dont touch it..
bee: frwons yes Miss
anki: now what i want u to do...is spank ur pussy.... 25 times... stop frowning bitch
bee: yes Miss
anki: dont stop//..25 continuous ...and hard
bee: yes Miss i will
anki: i want each slap on ur pussy to sting
bee: nods


and then she asked me what came after 9...
sigh...lol

umm sorry for making this one long..
will tlak to you later tonight..

pee stats:

NOVEMBER 21:
2:30pm - 30 sec.
5:00pm - 35 sec.
7:30pm - 25sec.
9:10pm - 35 sec.
10:00pm - 20 sec.


NOVEMBER 22:
1:35am - 30 sec.
4:20am - 45 sec.
6:30am - 20 sec.
9:45am - 50 sec.
1:20pm - 30 sec.
3:10pm - 35 sec.
4:40pm - 20 sec.
6:15pm - 20 sec.
8:45pm - 45 sec.
10:20pm - 35 sec.

Bimbo fun

I am really excieted about the bimbo you found... and I think it would be interesting to play both a sub and a domme... :-D

I like the idea... hoefully it will go smoothly..
I don't really have much to say... and also I'm kinda getting late to go grab lunch... its already 2:30!
So yeah... we will talk more tonight...

Here is my Pee Stats:

NOVEMBER 21:

12:40am - 45 sec. (old rule)
1:50am - 25 sec.
4:15am - 30sec.
6:20am - 30 sec.
9:40am - 45 sec.
12:05pm - 20 sec.

Shall update more as soon as possible. Have a wonderful day!
Talk to you soon!

HI

Hi baby
so I did talk to her... hmmm she is really bimbo-ish...lol
maybe a lil bit too much... and also her being younger than ,me isnt too much fun either... but gotta talk to her more and see how things go...

ok pee times:

NOVEMBER 18:

9:05pm - 70 seconds
12:30am - 80 seconds
2:00am - 65 sec.


NOVEMBER 19:

5:40am - 75 sec.
7:00am - 80 sec.
9:10am - 90 sec.
12:20pm - 60 sec.
2:30 pm - 105 sec.
5:00pm - 60 sec.
7:10pm - 65 sec.
8:35 pm - 100sec.
10:40pm - 70 sec.
11:10pm - 85 sec.

NOVEMBER 20:

6:30am - 105 sec.
9:10am - 65 sec.
10:30am - 55 sec.
12:10pm - 60 sec.
1:15pm - 70 sec.
3:00pm - 90 sec.
5:30pm - 80 sec.
8:20 pm - 95 sec.
9:00pm - 65 sec.
11:15pm - 55 sec.


I'm sorry for not putting it up last night..
I love you master...I'll talk to u soon
KISS

Loong Day

Hi baby..
It's been a loong loong day...
But it was good ...
I was thinking about you a lot...
And took some pics too, which I'll show once I get them uploaded.
I WANT TO SEE YOU!
:-(

Oh.... i'll update on the pee stats later because the paper I write it on is in my car, and I forgot to bring it in tonight..

I don't really have any new thoughts tonight...
Just that I love you...
:-)
Talk to you soon...

I love you

Hey Baby
okay lemme give you the stats first...

NOVEMBER 17:

6:10pm - 70 sec.
8:40pm - 75 sec.
10:30pm - 90 sec.

NOVEMBER 18:

12:00am - 60 sec.
2:20am - 75 sec.
4:40 am - 90sec.
6:30am - 60sec.
9:40am - 75sec.
11:20am - 125 sec. ( :-S )
with you - ?? sec. ( :-S )

next in 5 minutes...

The cucumber... LOVED it.
It hurt.... but I loved the feeling of being so full....

Ok pee - pee time...BRB

okay it took 55 seconds...

:-)

Umm... i came across this beautiful song yesterday... and umm... it's something for you...
Here's how the song goes...
Its called 'Stickwitu' and The Pussycat Dolls sang it..
You should check out the song sometime too...its a really nice number...

Ohhh.. Oh Oh.. 

I don't wanna go another day 
So I'm telling you, exactly what is on my mind 
Seems as like everybody is breaking up 
and throwing their love away 
But I know I got a good thing right here 
That's why I say (Hey) 

Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever 
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u 
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u, my baby 
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u 

I don't wanna go another day 
So I'm telling you, exactly what is on my mind 
See the way we ride, in our private lives 
Ain't nobody gettin' in between 
I want you to know that, your the only one for me 

Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever 
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u 
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u my baby 
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u 

And now, ain't nothing else I can need 
And now, I'm singing.. 'cause your so, so into me 
I got you, we'll be making love endlessly 
I'm with you, baby you're with me 

So don't cha worry about 
people hanging around 
they ain't bring us down 
I know you, and you know me 
and that's all that counts 
So don't cha worry about 
people hanging around 
they ain't bring us down 
I know you, and you know me 
and that's why, that's why I say 

Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever 
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u 
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u my baby 
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u 

Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever 
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u 
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u my baby 
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u 

:-)

I think it's amazing how the song resembles our situation...

For this to happen...the first thing is to make ourselves believe it will...
I love you... I love you so so dearly... I can't even put it to words..

You are a very special person... :-)
I LOVE YOU!

Stats

NOVEMBER 16:

4:50pm - 85 seconds
5:20pm - 55 seconds
8:40pm - 95 seconds
10:30pm - 60 seconds.

NOVEMBER 17:

5:30 am - 70 seconds
7:30am - 60 seconds
10:15am - 60 seconds
2:00pm - 90 seconds
4:30pm - 80 seconds

Sorry that I havnt been able to say much on here for the past few days...
I'm hoing I'll get a chance to say more on here once I get things done for tommorow.
I can't wait to talk to you later tonight.
Kiss

Today

It's been a very very stressful day..
The laptop is causing problems still again..
My boss is now helping me... and she is going to the important people to help me...so thats good..
I am probably going to be up for a while tonight...just studying..
I am just trying to be calm... and just get this all over with..
I love you and I miss you very badly...
:-(

Pee Stat

NOVEMBER 15:

10:20 pm - 85 seconds

NOVEMBER 16:

7:30am - 60 sec.
12:40pm - 50 sec.
1:30 pm - 75 sec.

Stats

NOVEMBER 15

6:10am - 70 seconds
7:40 am - 45 seconds
12:45pm - 90 seconds
2:10pm - 65 seconds
5:30pm - 60 seconds
8:30pm - 70 seconds
9:25pm - 65 seconds


I really enjoyed our conversation earlier this evening..
I trust you, and I know you would take care of me..
But thank you for comforting me... and telling me things that made me feel safe and protected..
You know, I am very lucky..
Most people, when they find a partner... they find someone to love.
But for me.... with you, I would have found a lover, a friend, a companion, and a Master.

Only time will tell how true these feelings are... But I think I already know how I will feel.

At first... there were some weird moments...
at first...there were times when I wasnt sure about how I left..

I am now discovering myself..
And reaching deep under me...where these feelings are hidden... feelings that I didnt even know existed..

There is an overwhelming desire to meet you... and to be with you.

There was a lot of heated passion in the beggining..
and now...its still there, but there is something more realistic too..

This whole experience is not a fantasy.. its reality.

I understand, as much as I can without experiencing anything, that entering this lifestyle would probably be the most drastic decison for me..
Things wont always be pleasant ..
There will be times of discomfort..
times when im pushed beyond my imaginations,
there will be times, i will want to cry and beg for mercy...
But in those times..
when things are unpleasant... I will remind myself that there is a wonderful place ahead of all the unpleasantness.
wehn i feel the discomfort, I will look into your eyes... and look for all the support and love I will need.
when I am stretched futher than I thought possible... I will boaden my horizons... and let you guide me even further
when I want to cry out loud, I will hear your voice, I will feel your soft touch, your gentle kiss, and your hard beatings...

There will be a wonderful place always ahead of me.... I will push myself till I get there


I love you. Have a wonderful night. I'm going to miss you.
Muah!

Scared

Hello..
I came across this one movie clip page earlier today... and it showed a sub being tied and she was getting her tits and pussy pierced..
and umm it looked really really scary..
I knew it would be painful..
but it's just been on my mind all day long..

I'll come update this post once I get home and give you the link to that site..

I love you.


Heres that SITE

Pee Stat

NOVEMBER 14

7:10 am - 35 seconds
10:20 am - 15 seconds
3:05 pm - 25 seconds
5:20 pm - 10 seconds
9:20 pm - 30 seconds

NOVEMBEER 15 - now

1:40 am - 25 seconds

Last Night

Last night was just absolutely amazing..

I love that now u are going to monitor the time I take to pee... and its probably going to get stricter and stricter with time..

I absolutely love our ideas about the new accounts and what we are going to do with them...

I love the idea of being on cam, for anyone that you allow to see..
that would be the sluttiest thing I have done.. and I know there will be more to come..

You asking me about the safe word...and saying I will probably need it..
The possibilities make me so wet...I wouldnt know what is to come...there is going to be a lot of surprises...
All I would know is that I would have to do what you tell me to.
Irrispective of how humiliating and slutty it might be

I want to be your slut, your whore, your puppet, yours...to be used any way you want.
Thank you master, for giving me a chance like this.

Looking Back

Wow... I really poured myself out last night huh?

I just usually keep things from the past bottled up.. But once I start... you know what happens then... :-)

Hmmm so much to be said... and I'm not sure where to start..

First of all... again, I'm sorry for doubting you... I know you forgave me... but I am really sorry..

And you thinking that I am happy with the way my life is..
I guess that shows what I good job I have done at faking it... At making people believe that I am happy..

:-)

And taking it one day at a time... will probably make things a little more realistic..

I love you very much and don't want to do anything to make you feel like I am putting any kinda pressure on you...or our relationship.

Our conversation today was really special..
It mean a lot to have you tell me about your life..

Okay so now back to last night..
I cant help the jealousy...
And I know I need to work on it..
And remind myself and believe that I am your true girl
I think my past trust issues make this task harder..
But I will do it,..
I will trust you with all my heart little by little

Just growing together one day at a time..
I wish I had written this blog earlier when my thoughts were fresh..
I just got really wrapped up...but I might get back to this once I get a chance to rethink what i feel.
I will get back to this later...sorry.

She Smiles

You've made me happy
You've made me sad
You've made me laugh
You've made me cry
But most importantly...
You've made me smile..every single day.

You've made me believe, hope, desire, love, and submit.

You've dont little things every day in the past month and a half...to shape me into who i was always meant to be.

I am thankful.
I love you.

Beginnings

I found this lovely poem today, and it made me think of you. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did...
I love you.

You came into my life with understanding and taught me love,
You came into my heart with a force that could not be of this world,
You came into my soul like the warm wind of a summer's day,
You brought with you joy and peace such as I had never known,
It is now a world of new beginnings and endless hopes.
You hold my heart, trembling, and submissive to your will.
And I am Yours forever.

Punishment Aftermath :-D

LOL... I still can't believe I went 5.5hrs without using the bathroom..
Cause usually I go almost every hour..
and I finished up my water.. much earlier..
:-D

And it actually wasn't all that bad... I did go thru this real real bad little 15 minutes.. but after that I kept my mind busy.. so I wasnt thinking about wanting to pee.
About being wet... I didnt realize how wet I was until I went to pee...my panties were soaked..
:-)
LOL I didn't run to the bathroom...but I did walk really fast..
And I think I kept saying 'Oh myGod' the whole time..hahaha

I am very happy... and I think you are too :-)
Talk to you later tonight

Part 7

PHEW!
oh thank god..

i cant think right now...
lol

ahh my stomach hurts..

and my cheeks are super blushy
lol

i did it
and thats all that matters

i love you

Part 6 (i think..)

15 more minutes!!!! FIFTEEENNNNN

Part 5

and now.. about 30 more minutes to go
thank you lord!!!
oh my god... what my clit is feeling is so powerful, i dont even feel the bottle any more..
its like its become part of my whole body..
im proud of being able to stick thru this..
i really didnt think i would be able to
but i did!
lol im not screwing up in teh last 30 mins
no ways!
and im not gonna cum without u telling me i can...never again
lol
it's almost got to this point wehre the pain of not being able to pee.. and not peeing for so long... is keeping me wet
:)
The countdown has now begun...lol 28 mins to go

Part 4

okay,.. a little better now... been keeping myself busy... im wet ... i cant control it..
im doing better than what i thought i will do..
so its good..
still hurts
not as bad
lol hopefully i wont pee on my 'run' to the bathroom

Part 3

It hurts..
it hurtssssssss
i need to peeee soooo baaaadddd
ahhh 2 more hrs!

Punishment Update, Part 2

Now I feel like I need to pee...
I've drank about 5oz of water so far..
and Im dripping wet...

Punishment Update, Part 1

Hey Master
The interview was allright...not that great... I'm probably not gonna go thru the next part... but it was a positive experience and I learned from it..

I have done what you have told me to do as per the punishment..
And I am wet right now..

Shall update more in about an hour or so...
Love you.

Punishment, Part 2

I keep wondering what the punishment is going to be,..
And I am soon to find out..
Hmm...this is going to be interesting

HI

Wow...it's been an interesting day..
As I told you, I took the laptop to tech services... and then when I brought it back, they said that the problem was fixed..
And then when we were talking...it happened again!
Now I have the same hard drive... and a different laptop... I am hoping the harddrive isnt messed up...cause if it is, then it's likely that we wont be able to talk again tonight...
And I really want to talk tonight..
So now after my class tonight...Im gonna spend time preparing for the interview..
I didnt even accept them to accept my application cause it was already past the date when they were going to let the students know..
So it's all a rush-rush..
I did buy a jacket adn matching pants..
So I got the looks covered...LOL
Anyways...it's almost time for class..
I just wanted to keep the ritual going :-)
I love you
Talk to you later.

Punishment

I thought last night about the appropriate punishment for cumming before you told me to..

I think I should have my pussy stretched with an object of your choice for a long time.... maybe put it in when I come back home from school and leave it there until you tell me to remove it..
I thought that you could make me put it in during the eveining.. have it in for about 4 hrs or more when I meet you online..
and then when we talk... I would have to spank myself... maybe fuck myself but under no condition would i be allowed to cum....
and then if you would like...leave it inside me throughout the night..
this way i would be wet a lot...
but still i wouldnt cum..
i dont know... hopefully u like this..
talk to u later

Hi!

I am glad we got to talk last night..
It was really assuring when you said that I would be the one that would share the bed with you at the end of the day when we were talking about the other female and things like that..

It's hard to believe this is real..
You are just what I want and need...
Just a great balance of being a strict master and a loving person
:-)
I just want you to know...that I love the way you make me feel.
Thank You for what you have done to me..so far...
I so look forward to seeing what the future holds for us.
:-)
Take care. Talk to you later tonight.
XOXO

The Other Female

Hehe yeah that's what's on my mind...
Honestly... I don't think another female is necessary
It would definately spice things up.. and things would get really really interesting... but still..
But I am going to still keep looking..
And bump into someone that ideally could switch..
I think a person who can switch would work perfectly..
or maybe a bisexual person who is curious about the lifestyle..
Hmmm...
It actually makes me wet..
So that's a good thing.. :-)
There are so many things between us...that aren't exactly something I am 'interested' in...
But still it's those things that turn me on..
I think it's just amazing...
:-)

No Title

Again, I am so sorry for last night..
I feel so miserable about it..
Please forgive me... even wehn you left... it seemed like you were mad.
And I understand why you are mad...
It was just cause I was tired and sleepy... I just want you to know that I always look forward to talking to you... I feel content when I talk to you...
I was just not physically exhausted...
I am not making excuses... I hope you understand...
I love you very much..

I think something interesting happened today...
I went online to play a game of pool...
and I ended up going on a table with someone whose rating was really high...he/she might have been at 1450 or so... and I'm in the 1100s...
And first I did not innitiate the game, cause I thought there was no way I would win..or even close... I thought it would be a clean sweep..
But then I just told myself to give it a try just for the heck of it..
and I told myself, that if I woould win... or even get close, we would meet for sure..
(Since it happeneing is so far from now... I was wondering if it would actually happen.. I want it to)
And yeah... as you might have guessed...since I am writing this..
I did win the game..





I love you.

A First

It all statred out like every other night..
She caught a couple hours of sleep before he would come online, making up for the 3 hour time difference that physically seperated them.
Setting the alarm for 11:15pm.
He really liked the fact that she would wake up just for him.
She was changing because of him, for him...
Going to bed early, waking up to talk to him, and going to bed only when he was ready to go to sleep.
Each conversation was precious and made the bond between them stronger and stronger.

She woke up at 11:15pm, and turned on the laptop, and got freshened up in the mean time.

He soon came online...she greeted him with a big smile.
Their conversation started out with her inquiring about his day, and how he was.
It them preceeded onto thier ritual of her displaying sexy pictures she had found for him.

They could feel the blood rishing faster through their bodies.
The sexual tension increasing...she was not allowed to touch herself or cum. Nor was she allowed to ask for it.
She struggled the temptations as he asked her questions about the pictures he was seeing.

He told her how big his cock was, from looking at the pictures.
She: "Ummmm..... this is so hard."
Him: "Don't touch baby."
She: "I wont. I want you so bad."
Him: "I know baby. Our time will come."

Making her think about the endless posibilities of the things that were to come when that moment would finally arrive.

He knew she was wet and needed to touch herself.
He knew how easily he could turn her on and make her pussy throb to be touched.
And he did just that...turning her on...

Him: "Do you want me to treat you like my cumslut? Use you as my fucktoy?"
She: "Yessss...Please master."

He talked about how he would pull on her long hair and how his cock would violate her pussy.

She wanted to scream in pain. She felt like she could not take any more.
Squeezing her legs... and holding onto the pillow...she let her pussy take over... and came...

She: "Shit.. I came."
Him: "Did you touch yourself?"
She: "No Master."
Him: "You came without touching yourself? Just from my words?"
She: "Yes Master."
Him: "This is the first time isnt it?"
She: "Yes Master. I am sorry."
Him: "I told you that you couldn't touch yourself. So you obeyed me. But you disobeyed me when you came."
She: "Yes master...sorry."
Him: "But also.....I did it to you."
She: "You teased me a lot master."
Him: "Yes I did...on purpose. I meant it too. I controlled you."

He asked her what she thought her punishment should be. She suggested that she should spank herself.. He thought it would be a good punishment.

He ordered her to turn on her cam and strip for him.
Once she did that, he made her stretch her legs and open her tight hole.
He wanted 21 spanks... 21 accurate spanks.
And she gave him just that..
1st spank... she was glad to be touching herself.
2nd spank.... a little burn..
3rd spank... she could feel where her hands tuched her body..
The burning and stinging intensified with each spank..

Immediately followed by her explaining how she would suck his cock...
How his cock would make her gag
Him: "You bitch! Suck me hard and take all my cock."
Him: "Show me what a hot little bitch you are."
And once she explained how she would swallow his cum...
Him: "Nowwwww plunge two fingers into your pussy."
This then advanced to three fingers,.. and then four.
Stretching her tight little pussy.
And then he asked her to cum... and so she did... better than she had before..

A reward and a punishment..
Reaching a point of no control without even touching herself..
A proud accomplishment...

And then... it was followed by another first...
Him: "I love you."
She: "I love you too master."

I Miss You

I hope you reached there safely.
And I hope everything goes smoothly there.
I am so used to talking to you every day now...it seems like routine work..
So yesterday was hard... atleast we got to talk for some time before you left...
I Miss You!
Hmmm... sorry that this is short... I dont have much to say.
I can't wait to be with you.
I love you.

Promise

MY PROMISE TO YOU, MASTER:

I promise that from now on, I will not touch my pussy or play with it, unless you allow me to do so.
And also, I will not cum until you allow me to.
I will never ask for it either.
I wont ever say 'May I cum' or 'May I touch myself.'
With this promise, I give this part of my body in your hands...
And I give you the complete control over what happens to it and when.
I will also let you know, if I do touch myself and/or if I cum.

I understand that I will be punished when I break this promise..
And this is what I think should be done when I break the promise..

I think the punishment for touching should be more severe compared to the punishment I would get if I came.
I say that cause I can actually physically control myself when it comes to touching myself.
Controlling when I cum might be a little harder to do... and I think it would take some work before I am able to control that.

I think I should be hit' when I break the promise.
It might be just slapping certain parts of my body, or using some tools..

Maybe clamping my nipples and then pulling the them up and slapping myself..

I found THIS website where I read some really interesting things that I think we could use...

Orgasm Denial

This is a fun, and frustrating, technique that can bring some of the spark back into sex. There are a hundred variations, but the basic idea is simple: prevent your partner from having an orgasm for a length of time (a day, two days, a week, whatever you want). You shouldn't make it easy; you can, for example, require that your partner have sex one or more times a day, or masturbate regularly (this works well when combined with a ritual of some sort), but your partner is not allowed any sexual release. Over time, the sexual tension builds up, and your partner becomes perpetually aroused.

I think this would be good... I think it would be a great punishment if I came.. and you could decide based on why and when I came, the amont of time you would want me to practice this.

Also another link was THIS

Make a deck of punishment cards for selecting the punishment.

For making the deck, get some stiff cards and write (or make your sub write, or do it together) a punishment on each card. When the moment arrives, shuffle the deck of cards, make the sub cut it, and whichever is the top card left after the cut is the punishment the sub will receive.

I think it would be a good way for the both of us to work together...

I have had a real hard time trying to think of punishments...
I dont think what I have here is good enough.
Sorry master...
I will look more into this, and I think I will get a better idea when we talk about it.

AHHHH I wanna cum!
LOL
I only searched for a few pictures today.. I dont know if thats okay.. since we didnt get to check out pictures last night..
I dont think it's okay...so I will have to find some more before we meet tonight.
Hmm... I dont really have much to say today..
I havnt had much to say of lately..
Just no new thoughts about us..
I love you...